Very slow after hibernation
What is happening to the computer that it takes such a long time to come back and start up after being on hibernate?
Are the stored bits undergoing radioactive decay or something?
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Windows becomes slower with time either if it is running or if not. Especially Vista, which has some special code to make it slow.
No, seriously, it shouldn't happen. I only know that when I leave it powered off for a long time, than it wants to delete all of my desktop icons and hides every start menu item, because they "haven't been used for a long time". It also warns for outdated security updates, anti-virus etc. But I don't have any idea why it would slow down waking up from hibernation. Maybe it detects that things are outdated and starts scanning for them automatically just after waking up.
Now I have a question: did you experience this problem yourself, or you rely only on a Twitter user on this? Because this may not be the best place to discuss urban legends.
And finally, an advice. Since Windows gets slower and slower as you use it, and hibernate doesn't help it, sometimes it just needs to be restarted. So if you don't plan to use your computer for a long time, just switch it off. When you turn it on next time, it will be better if you see a nice and clean session, and it is also unlikely that you will use exactly the same programs you left open when you hibernated.
There's your answer. It wasn't a matter of hibernation, it was a matter of leaving it for two months.
If you were running Windows 7 on a physical box the explanation could be quite simple, namely the kind of hybrid sleep it does. It'll sleep for some time, then go into hibernation.