I have seen (and am using) the "hack" to make Safari open links in a new tab that would normally open in a new window, but now what I am looking for is a way to make links that should open in a new window open in the same window and tab, and only open a new one when I tell it to.
This Greasemonkey (GreaseKit is the port Safari) script will accomplish "all links in same window/tab" functionality: http://naruzo.vox.com/library/post/greasekit-script-to-open-all-links-in--same--tab-killtargets.html
Doesn't seem like it's possible. Found another one who wanted this: http://forums.macrumors.com/archive/index.php/t-614308.html
I guess the only thing left to do is write hatemail to Jobs. :)