I have a near out-of-the-box Apache server running through XAMPP. My firewall has an exception for every port 80 in and out in any protocol (I am aware this is a security risk, but I am desperate). My router has port 80 forwarded from internal port 80 at my correct local IP address. My server is viewable to all machines on my network including the host itself. Unfortunately, the server cannot be seen by the outside world, and no settings recommended in over 4 hours of internet researching have helped resolve the problem. I can also assure that my router (Belkin N+) port forwarding works, because I am able to host gaming servers without a problem.
Here is my HTTPD.CONF: https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/57282495/Temporary/httpd.conf (Apparently posting the file contents here is impossible, *sarcastic anger*)
My server does not have an HTTPD-VHOSTS.CONF for some reason... I tried copying a standard template from the internet and it made no difference. Also, to eliminate other confusion, my ISP does not block any ports and the server does not work externally regardless of which port I set it to run on.
Thanks for all the help I can get!